5 things I learned in 2017

  1. I learned to equip myself before disaster happens. We hear people say, “you don’t know how you’d react in this situation until it happens.” Which is true, but I learned that it is important to know how you will react to something before it happens and prepare yourself for it. It is easier for us to prepare our bodies for old age by eating well and exercising. It makes sense to us to prepare for snowstorm or hurricane but rarely do we prepare ourselves for emotional traumas. I’m not saying live in fear of something bad happens but know what you going to do when suffering happens.
  2. I learned that morning always come.
  3. I learned to allow people to be humans. Meaning, humans are fragile and flighty. They break promises. They look out for themselves and their best interest. Humans fall short and it’s all okay. I learned to allow people to be all those things without taking it personal.
  4. I learned the meaning of the truth that God is good.
  5. I learned to be open about my feelings, whether it’s with people or in my journal. Mostly my journal. But releasing things from my heart to paper and also speaking about them out loud literally saved me. In my journal I’m pretty sure I’ve written about the same topic 50 times, can you imagine keeping those thought in my head? I would burst. Output is so important. Emotions will swallow you whole if you do not release. I learned to release.

What are some of your lessons from 2017?

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it’s not the time to lie down and die

I just want to say that over and over again over my life and really to anyone going through a bitter season right now. I understand all too well how life can be so wicked and how your joy can be stolen. But hear me when I say this..

now, is not the time to lie down and die- Kristen Demarco

Go through whatever you need to go through. Cry those tears. Turn off that phone. Argue with God. Feel the pain. Really feel the pain. Call the friends that will speak truth into your life. mourn the loss. feel the disappointment. But carry on.

I won’t even say take it day by day because sometimes even that seem impossible. So I’ll say push through every hour. Really. Get though the morning, then the afternoon, soon you will be wrapping up the day. But whatever you do, do not let your pain overcome you.

do not let your pain overcome you

I just had to say that a little a bit louder for the people in the back and to my very own stubborn heart.

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True life: I feel behind in life

img_4505Something I have been struggling for the last few months is feeling behind in life. I feel that at this age and at this time, I really should have my affairs in order. These are things I think I should have sorted out already:

  • I should have my dream or at least “good” job that pays well.
  • I should not have to worry about money.
  • I should have a partner who wants a future with me or at least potential someone who text me. lol.
  • I should be emotionally stronger.
  • I should be going on trips in different countries.

Sometimes, I feel like there is one way of being an adult and everyone learned it as soon as they began adulting and I’m still oblivious to it all. Everyone appears to be adulting really well, moving forward and getting shit done and I am still left behind watching it happen.

This might seem silly to some but it is so real to me on most days. Almost all of my friends are in their desired career and I am still job-ing it out. It leaves me feeling like I am not qualified enough to even be their friends. It leaves me feeling like I have nothing of value to bring into a relationship. To be completely candid, sometimes, I feel really inferior compared to the people I know.

I don’t know if anyone feels this way sometimes, but if you do, just know that I feel it too.