Tag Archives: christian blogger

2018 Word of the Year: HOPE

It amuses me that I’m about to write about hope and I’m not feeling very hopeful at this moment.

About 3 hours prior to crossing over to the new year I had this burst of anxiety and I haven’t been able to shake it. I’m anxious about 2018  bringing more pain with it. This is so far from what hopeful person should be thinking, so I guess that’s a good word for me after all, huh?

Why I chose this word

In 2017, I felt a hopelessness I’ve never felt before and it was dark and scary. You know the light at the end of the tunnel people are so fond of talking about, I couldn’t see it so I am pretty certain that there was a huge rock blocking it and I was literally suffocating with just feelings of things never getting better for me. I really wish I could share all that happened but I’m really not ready. But it really left me feeling like there is absolutely nothing to live for. I think hopelessness is how the enemy convince us that nothing good is going to come out of our lives and that we are probably better off dead.

I picked hope just to remind myself to trust in the infinite wisdom of God and the infinite goodness of God.

What does hope mean to me

  • It means knowing who the source of my hope is- so I plan to really engage with scripture and in prayer. My thought process is this, if God is who He says and I believe that He is who He says he is, then I can put all of hope in Him and trust that, he will not disappoint. Hope is described as a confident assurance.
  • It means living with the expectation of seeing the goodness of God in my life
  • It means living bold and fearless knowing that God’s got my back.
  • It means believing that I’m untouchable and the Good Shepherd watches over me.
  • It means peace when I feel like my world is breaking.
  • Hope means trusting a God who is Sovereign. Jesus who empathizes with us and Holy Spirit who lives in us.
  • It means Selah- pausing and praising
  • It means understanding that the Kingdom of God is already here in part, and also anticipating with excitement of the Kingdom being FULLY realized when Jesus steps in.
  • It means working hard, believing that it will pay off.
  • It means joy and rest

I’ll try and do updates on the word through out the year.

Do you have a word of the year? or did you make an resolution?

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Life lately: December 2017

What? It is December already? I am not complaining at all. I want 2017 to be over already. I thought 2015 and 2016 were tough but boy was I wrong. haha

The last time I wrote one of these was towards the end of October, so I guess I’m going to chat about life since then.

I’ve been pretty active on this blog but not as much as I wanted to be. I still have many drafts that need to be completed and posted and many ideas that I want to share. I’ve been trying to incorporate other things on this blog but I do not know how people will receive it so I’ve stopped myself. But I’m thinking I’m going to try anyways. I feel like my blog is really scattered and I want it to be really focused so I hope to figure it out before the New Year begins. Leave me feed back? I also need to change my about me and contact section.

Lately, I’ve tasted the bitterness (I use the word bitter a lot here, I’m sorry, I have no other words) of lost opportunities. I’ve always been one of those people that didn’t do this or didn’t do that and I wasn’t going to bend for any reason. But lately, my lack of flexibility have really bit me in the bum and it really sucks. It hurts. I’ve cried. I just really want tell you all to be really open in this life. I’m learning that myself. Seriously, date that guy or girl, move, take that job, go to that show, etc… Really. I’ve missed out on a specific opportunity twice and now its too late, and it my bitter pill to swallow, and it is not going down easy at all. But I’ve learned my lesson.

Speaking of taking chances. I have this big thing I am doing soon and I am scared. But more on that later.

I found out that my health isn’t that great and I have work to do. This is why I hate hospitals because they always give you bad news. haha.

I’ve also been reading about the Exodus of the Israelites. They were so funny. But such a reflection of who we are as believers these days. One day we are all God is good and then 5 minutes later, we complain about not seeing his goodness. I don’t know, but read Exodus in the Bible even if you aren’t a Christian, it is a really good story.

Life lately is me healing or God healing me and just putting all the broken pieces together. I am trusting Him for full and complete healing and I am hopeful it is going to come.

The greatest thing that has happened lately is, I became an aunt again!! With my sister’s permission, I will share a picture soon.

I have a new instagram. FOLLOW

How has life been lately?

may joy meet you in the morning

IMG_1982 (2)Happy New Month

early in the morning, I will celebrate the light, when I stumble in the darkness, I will call Your name by night

In my last post I wrote about how tough the last few weeks have been, you can read about it HERE. Usually, I leave it all here and don’t come back to tell about my okay days, and the mornings when joy met me by the time my feet touched the floor.

God has been showing up

But in unexpected ways.

At my lowest, sometime last week, I kept repeating to myself, ” I have no one, I absolutely have no one.” but I know this is a lie. There was this battle in my heart, where I wanted to keep saying “I have no one” but I felt in my heart that i really didn’t believe it and it was the enemy willing me to say it enough so I would believe it.

you can have all this world, give me Jesus

My hearts desire

Everything isn’t all of sudden perfect, God didn’t perform some magic trick and all of sudden my life was golden. God didn’t make the pain go away. But what God did was remove the hopelessness from my heart and replace it with peace. God gave me strength to wake-up and accomplish the tasks before me with a clear mind, I still cried when I laid down, but I got shit done. God gave me a song and he softened my heart and I was able to let go of my pride.

I don’t know how tomorrow is going to look like but today, I am okay. I am okay with the mess and the tears. I am okay with the sadness, and hopeful that it will pass. I am okay with the fact that tomorrow might be a struggle but thankful that God is already there waiting to meet me and hold me.

God is good. I am thankful that I know this truth…

You have no rival, You have no equal, now and forever God you reign. Yours is the kingdom. Yours is the glory. Yours is the name above all names.

I just pray peace over anyone who stumbles on this post. I pray for peace and grace in whatever situation you’re going through. I pray the Lord will give you rest, and that you find joy in the morning.