You love who you love?

IMG_0593.jpgAm I the only who can’t seem to grasp the concept of loving someone and being in love with someone? When it is explained to me, I get it, but when I am alone and I think about it, it just doesn’t make sense. What is even more troublesome to me is when someone say they love someone but they are in love with another person. I also don’t understand why people glorify the “in love” love. I’m going to attempt to define what my understanding of being in love and loving someone mean.

being in love

I think being in love is a highly emotional charged feeling, similar to infatuation. I think when someone is in love with someone, they want that person around or need them around. They obsess over the person. They are crazy over the person. Their senses are heightened when the person is around. They feel immense pleasure just by this persons presence or accidental touch. Anything and everything about this person excites them. They do not see the person for who they really are because they are so blinded by being in love.  


I think when you love someone, you’ve made a decision about that person. You understand that there is purpose in that person being in your life. You do not like that person all the time but there is nothing you wouldn’t do for them. When you love someone, you think about their heart and less about how you feel. That person is security for you. That person is stability for you.

**Based on my description, I’ll take someone loving me for $100 please. haha

I don’t know if any of you watch The Bachelor, but this past season was out of control because the bachelor initially chose someone he loved then left her for someone he was in love with.

He plainly said, he could see a future with the woman he chose and loved. He knew she would be a good mother and be a good wife. He knew she would make him happy BUT he was in love with someone else. So obviously there was an uproar. People were upset because he left the woman he loved for the one he was in love with. Others said he was courageous for following his heart.

I still haven’t decided

What he did was juvenile in my eyes, but I appreciate it, not because he left but because he freed the woman he left.

I think people glorify being in love because it so passionate and it is so obvious. But to me, it is surface level love at best and doesn’t really require any hard work. Loving someone requires digging deep, knowing what you want and protecting the heart of the beloved. People see this as settling. I don’t agree.

I think being in love fades, because there was no decision involved. Loving someone is or could be forever.

So, when you are faced with picking someone you are in love with and someone you love, pick the person you love. But when you find someone whom you are in love with AND love, pick that person over anyone. hahaha. Don’t listen to me. I’m single AF.

I do hope that you all find someone that you feel both things for. And do not get me wrong, I am not dismissing the feelings of being in love, I think it is very important in the longevity of a relationship, but it cannot stand on its own, it will need to come with something. Loving someone can stand on its own.

Let me know what you think?




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