I realized after my last relationship that I was one of those people that sit around waiting for someone to make them happy.
I didn’t like discovering this truth about myself.
Although we came into this world alone, we were also created for relationships, but not to be codependent on people. For me, finding happiness outside of my relationships was something I found impossible to do. But I knew I had to change because the truth is, everything in this life is temporary and no one is guaranteed to be around for as long as you’d like them to be. Also, there is no guarantee that we will all find our “person” or soulmate or significant other who is going to come into our lives and brighten it up and bring us happiness. No person holds your happiness or mine.
I’m sharing how I’ve learned or how I am learning to stop waiting for people to make me happy.
- Accept your alone-ness- I’m trying to not sound harsh. But if you are single right now, KNOW and ACCEPT and BELIEVE that you are single! You are single. You are alone! Really believe that. Being alone maybe to temporary or permanent, but once you’ve accepted this truth about your situation, you will be inclined to start looking out for yourself and finding happiness for yourself instead of waiting for someone.
- Engage in what brings you joy- If reading brings you joy, please read all the books. If music brings you joy, sing all the songs and play all the music. Do not waste time doing things that do not make you happy. Do not engage in things you feel blah about. You cannot afford to do that. so don’t.
- Build relationships- Naturally when people are in romantic relationships , especially ones where they depended on the other person fr happiness, they tend to drift away from their friends and family. This alone time is the perfect opportunity to build relationships you’ve allowed to fall off. I really hope you have good friends and family who will take you back. Rebuilding relationships with people who care about you has a way of reminding you that, you already have enough.
- Meet new people- Lately, I’ve discovered I really enjoy meeting new people, I’m still really awkward but its really nice to engage with people with no expectations.
- Be yourself- There is so much joy in being yourself and even having the opportunity to be yourself. You literally do not have to worry about anyone thinking the movies you enjoy are too boring or that your music sucks! This freedom alone is happiness within it self.
- Take care of yourself- For me, taking care of myself reminds me that I matter, and I deserve to be taken care of. And if no one is going to do it, which no one is obligated to, then I am able to do it myself.
I really just hope that this helps anyone who is waiting for someone to make them happy. I also hope that, happiness finds you. You are so precious and you deserve happiness.