I remember saying to one of my friends, “If you tell me you will be there, then I will for sure show up.” I wanted to go for a run, okay let me stop lying, I wanted to go for a jog, actually a walk, right? But I knew I wouldn’t commit to it unless my friend was going to be there. That settled it, I was going to go, so I don’t fail her or disappoint her. I was committed to her and so I knew I had to be there, I knew I had to show up.
I’ve been thinking about showing up lately, showing up for myself to be precise. Before I go any further, I know millennials are obsessed with “do what you like” attitude. I don’t think anyone should just do whatever they like, it is selfish and it shows that you lack self-control. So no, this isn’t about doing WHATEVER it is that you like but committing to showing up for ourselves. We’ve already learned how to be there for people, so the positive or good things that we do for others, or encourage others to do, we need to give those things to ourselves. We are just as important.
For me, if any of my friends ask me to wake up at 5:00am to take them to the airport or do something for them, I wouldn’t think twice about it. But waking up at 6:00am t go work out, do something good for my mind and body, I will make so many excuses and before I know it the day has passed me by.
Even in terms of work. I commit 8 hours a day to someone’s business, granted I get paid. But I can’t commit 2 hours to my own goals, even though that will provide me with the ultimate reward.
Along with that, isn’t it so funny how we do not mind spending money on our loved ones because we think they deserve it, but when it comes to buying something for ourselves, we go the cheap route? Maybe it is just me. But I am notorious for that. I will save up to buy someone something nice for someone, but I can never do so for myself.
I’m also not saying don’t do nice things for others, I’m just saying, do nice things for yourself too.
How I’m going to show up for myself is, when I begin making excuses not to do something, I will think about the most important person in my life, and ask myself, if this person wanted me to do this thing, would I make excuses or just show up for them? The answer will always be the latter. So because I am equally as important, I HAVE to show up for myself.
Showing up for myself means cultivating discipline, saying no, resting, and getting ish done even when I don’t want to. Showing up means not seeking validation from anyone, making myself happy, and getting through tough situations in healthy ways. Showing up for myself means no excuses. It means trying my best. It means not comparing myself to other people.
How do you show up for yourself?