I am not a queen, and that is okay

IMG_3948Hi friends,

Happy Thursday! This is going to be a little bit of a rant but not quite. For a long while I have been frustrated with people calling themselves kings and queens, more emphasis on the queen. I will be sharing why being labeled as a queenis problamatic.

It is a means of controlling women

This whole queen business, I believe is just another form of controlling women in society. I think in recent years,  we’ve got to a place where women are abandoning the whole notion of the “good girl” vs “bad girl” thing and genuinely started being themselves. Speaking up for them selves, finding sexual liberty, going after male-dominated career fields, demanding more, etc… women were no longer being controlled by the desrie to be a “good girl” and adhering to the means of which to become one. Then rose this whole notion of being a queen, this provided a way for people to have authority over women and how they should behave. So now what we have are women not living out their lives how they like but following some sort of guidelines so they could be called queens.

Who doesn’t want to called by a good name?.

where there is queenship, there is kingship. I’m not too concerned about what goes on in the homes of others, in regards to who is the leader and who isn’t. That isn’t what I am talking about here, if your partner is your king at home, by all means let it be. The problem is random men asserting their kingship on women they do not know from anywhere by dictating how a woman should conform to be a queen.

encourages competion among women

Referring back to my previous point, this whole notion of being a queen is really just another form of the “good girl” vs. “bad girl” idea that we all know so well.

My last book review was a book called LUCKY, in the book, Alice was raped. She kept referring to the fact that she was a good girl because she wa a virgin before she was raped and further went on to discuss how her being a “good girl” helped her win the case. It also gained her sympathy from the police officers who were on the case. I couldn’t believe she was saying that but it is the absolute truth. supposed “good girls” are always winning!

Similarly there is competition between “queens” and “others” where queens are deem worthy of respect, kindness, and are treated with value. But people who aren’t considered “queens” get treated with disdain. I have seen memes and Instagram posts of both men and women stating something along the lines of… “if you act like a queen, he wouldn’t disrespect you.” I’ve seen people putting up pictures of fully clothed woman next to barely clothed woman and labeling the one with more clothes on as the queen #thisishowaqueendresses. Now we have women judging each other referring to some as queens, others not. Honestly no one is queen, this type of competition is wasted energy. this brings me to my next point…

promotes the idea of unworthiness

The truth is we are naturally worthy of being treated decently by people. The even bigger truth is, you are not royalty.hahaha. Obviously there are some people whohail from a royal background but we aren’t speaking of queens in the technical way. All jokes aside, the bigger truth is, people are valuable within themselves and should be treated as such. Treating someone with kindness and respect shouldn’t be based on basic decisions they make like how much clothes they put on their body or choices they make in regards to how and who they date. You are worthy because you are human. You are enough because you are human. Your worth doesn’t come from being labeled as a queen. You are who you are, and that is enough.

How do you feel about being called a queen?


6 thoughts on “I am not a queen, and that is okay

  1. An extremely well-written post that is incredibly pertinent to many issues. Timing is perfect given “Women’s History Month,” which I find difficult to support because of “Queen” behavior. Tweeting this one for sure!

    Liked by 1 person

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