True life: I am obsessed with YOUR life

Do you find yourself going to the pages of certain people just to see what is new with them? The people I am talking about are not family and friends. I think you can stalk family and friends. In a way that is the purpose of social media, to catch up with YOUR people near and far because we are oh so busy to see or call each other. Social media gives us the pleasure and convenience of seeing how our friends and family are doing with a few pictures and a few words. This cut down the long, and really long conversations. “ain’t nobody got time for that.” But…

The obsession

To obsess is defined as: to preoccupy or fill the mind continually, intrusively and to a troubling extent. Y’all! I have been attached to my phone! No, I’m not reading the news, listening to music, texting, or anything my phone was meant for. I have been obsessing over other people’s lives. I’m sick just by saying this.

My morning start out something like this:

  • I wake-up in the middle of the night to go use the restroom, drink water, whatever, right? When I lie back down, guess what I’m doing? I check my facebook, instagram, and youtube. I don’t have a huge following on any of these platforms so I am not expecting messages or anything. I simply go one to see what is going on with people.
  • I eventually sleep again, maybe after 30 minutes. (30 mins. I can seriously use because the snooze button is my friend) I wake up when my alarm clock officially go off, and guess what I do? I pick my phone go through my social media and see if something new happened with all my dear and close friends, after all something major could have happened between 4:00am and 6:30am (NOT! I’m obsessed remember, none of these people are close friends)
  • I do this for another 30 minutes and THEN I want to go back to sleep. If you are decent at math, you will know I could have had an extra hour of sleep but I didn’t because I am obsessed with people’s life.

Why am I obsessed with the lives of others?

I can list a lot of reasons some silly some deep, but it all boils down to I AM DISSATISFIED WITH MY LIFE! And I’ll tell you why! I think people that are satisfied with their life have little to no time to focus on other people’s life. They do not know everyone’s every move, they do not care about everyone’s move. Not in a dismissive I don’t care way, but they are so focused on their own plate and trying to keep it satisfactory or looking for ways to make it satisfactory that they do not have room to care.

Unsatisfied people have misplaced motivation especially with the hype of social media. I’ve found that people who are dissatisfied with their lives measure satisfaction by the lives of others and social media make others’ lives easily accessible.

So, I look at my job, relationships, looks, etc…then I log into my social media account, find the account of someone who I’ve tricked myself into believing has a better life than me. Instantly I begin feeling unsatisfied with what I’ve got. So throughout the day, weeks, months, I follow this person’s life very closely to see what amazing thing they have going on that I do not. At this point I am so invested in this person’s life that I have no time for my own.

So who’s to blame?

I hear statements like, “why does he only post the good and flashy things on social media, how come she only talk about the promotions she gets at work, we all know relationships aren’t perfect so why do they look all lovey-dovey all the time, etc…” You catch my drift right? We put all the blame on people who are sharing their life in a certain which doesn’t make us feel good about ourselves because we are dissatisfied. We put the responsibility on them to dim their light for us. WHAT? How selfish?

But maybe I am to blame! We are to be blamed. We are the ones obsessed with this person’s life, why should they have to tone anything down for my pleasure, for your pleasure. If you, we, weren’t so consumed with their lives, we would be painting our own satisfactory life.

The solution

STOP IT! I don’t have any wise words that to say but we all of need to make a conscious effort to quit obsessing over the lives of others. Be it celebrities or some random person we went to high school with.

This is my FriYAY message! How do you refrain from occupying yourself with the noise of other people’s lives?

2 thoughts on “True life: I am obsessed with YOUR life

  1. I know exactly what you mean, this was me about 2 months ago even, including checking my phone in the middle of the night.
    But then, just like you, I realised that I spent too much time on my phone without actually doing anything.
    So, I made a conscious effort not to pick up my phone in the middle of the night… first thing I did was turn off all my notifications, so that there are no inviting blinking lights and I always try to put my phone a little distance away so that my idle hands don’t just pick it up and start on the mindless scrolling.

    Liked by 1 person

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