*hashtag: libranation* lol now that that’s out of the way…
Thinking of my birthday, naturally as a 20-something, one begins to re-evaluate his or her life. I began to think of different areas in my life and asking questions, such as, “how have I grown, how different am I from last year, did I accomplish anything, what have I done well in life, what areas in my life do I need to improve on, etc…?” Really tough questions. With questions like these comes a great deal of criticisms of ones self, which are obviously not a joy. To know our own shortcomings can be very rewarding, because knowing means there is an opportunity to fix. However one the downsides to knowing our shortcomings is the feeling of hopelessness. The voice that says, “you are too messed up to fix, you can’t find strength in this weakness.” That kind of hopelessness.
For my birthday this year, I’ve decided I’m going to dedicate 365 days to cultivating control over my emotions and thoughts. In doing so, I need to cultivate self-control and in order to have self-control, I need to know self.
Over the last few years, I’ve felt a bit lost, which I think is natural especially as a 2o-something, because we leave this teenage lifestyle of dependency and jump straight into this adult lifestyle of independence. One huge contribution among many others that have left me feeling lost and thus out-of-control is the inability to control my thoughts and allowing my mind to enter negative places and accept negative things. I need to do this to sustain myself, to find self-worth, to see the bigger picture of life and to just BE!
My mission is to be very mindful of my thoughts, and know myself well enough during this stage in my life to know what thoughts can or cannot live in my mind and heart. I do not know exactly how I am going to do this, but I am willing to read any books, pray how ever many times through out the day, talk to people who have mastered self-control and awareness and watch things that promote such.
So a toast to operation CULTIVATE SELF-CONTROL and a happy early birthday to ME!
let me know if you struggle with this as well. Check out my CONTACT page on how to reach me or simply leave a comment.
p.s, I have a snapchat: yaadoublea